Better Know a Regional Opponent: The Clemson University Tiger Kings

*Note that we will play a drinking game all weekend where we have to drink every time they mention:

a) Tim Corbin was an assistant coach at Clemson.

b) Clemson Head Coach Erik Bakich was an assistant coach at Vanderbilt under Tim Corbin.

c) The name “Jack Leggett.”

d) ...and finish your drink when they bring up the fact that both Tim Corbin and Erik Bakich were on Jack Leggett’s staff at Clemson in 2002.

Clemson is the #1 seed in the Clemson Region (duh), so we should plan to play them in the winner’s bracket Saturday if we defeat The Coastal Cackalacky Chaucer Roosters Friday... so let’s get to know way too much about them!

The School: Clemson University. Founded in... you know, I’mma just block quote a shitload from Wikipedia here, as it’s pretty strange:

Thomas Green Clemson, the university’s founder, came to the foothills of South Carolina in 1838, when he married Anna Maria Calhoun, daughter of John C. Calhoun, the South Carolina politician and seventh U.S. Vice President.^[13] When Clemson died on April 6, 1888, he left most of his estate, which he inherited from his wife, in his will to be used to establish a college that would teach scientific agriculture and the mechanical arts to South Carolinians.^[14] His decision was largely influenced by the future South Carolina Governor Benjamin Tillman.^[15] Tillman lobbied the South Carolina General Assembly to create the school as an agricultural institution for the state, and the resolution passed by only one vote.

In his will, Clemson explicitly stated he wanted the school to be modeled after what is now Mississippi State University: “This institution, I desire, to be under the control and management of a board of trustees, a part of whom are hereinafter appointed, and to be modeled after the Agricultural College of Mississippi as far as practicable.”^[16]

Clemson Agricultural College of South Carolina[edit]

Godfrey Hall, constructed in 1897, formerly housed the Textile Department.

In November 1889, South Carolina Governor John Peter Richardson III signed the bill, thus establishing the Clemson Agricultural College of South Carolina. As a result, federal funds for agricultural education from the Morrill Land-Grant Colleges Act and the Hatch Act of 1887 were transferred from South Carolina College (today, the University of South Carolina) to Clemson.^[13] Construction of the college began with Hardin Hall in 1890 and then main classroom buildings in 1891. Convict laborers, some as young as 13 years old, built many of the original buildings on campus.^[17] Henry Aubrey Strode became the first president of Clemson from 1890 to 1893. Edwin Craighead succeeded Strode in 1893. Clemson Agricultural College formally opened in July 1893 with an initial enrollment of 446. The common curriculum of the first incoming students was English, history, botany, mathematics, physics, and agriculture. Until 1955, the college was also an all-white male military school.

You heard right, Clemson is a University built by convicted child laborers that appropriated funds from The South Cackalacky Game Penises along with the willed fortune of John C. Calhoun (one step removed) to found a college that aspired to the intellectual heights of Mississippi State. The fuck? The ever-loving fuck?

The racial exclusionary military school aspect is the least strange part of all of this.

Location: Clemson, South Carolina. Wait... so Clemson founded a college named Clemson in Clemson? Was he a South Carolingian Groot?

The Mascot: “The Tiger” and “The Tiger Cub.” Bunch of certified geniuses over at Clemson University of Animal Husbandry A&M must have come up with this one.

‘24 Record: 41-14 (20-10 ACC).

How’d they get here? The Animal Husbandry Majors were already going to be a host going into their conference tournament on the strength of their, you know, wins and #7 RPI and whatnot. They did not win the ACC tourney, so they got an At-Large Bid. However, could someone find an insane person (*cough, Parlagi, cough*) to explain how in the ever-loving hell the ACC runs their tourney? Because Clemson didn’t play in either of the first two days, lost to Miami 8-7 on Thursday, beat Louisville 8-7 on Friday, and then never played again?!?!

Best win: They swept Florida State in a 3 game set in late march. FSU currently has an RPI of #8. They did not play arguably the best team in the ACC—UNC—all year. I have no idea how that happens, but I guess we’ll have to get used to that possibility once Boomer Sooner and Tejas join the SEC this Fall.

Worst loss: They were swept by Wake in May, but it was in Winston-Salem, and Wake is pretty good... so not that. No, it’s got to be that 9-5 midweek loss at the hands of The South Cackalacky-Upstate Fightin’ Upstarts on April 9th.

Player to Watch: #10 So. OF Cam “Cam Girl” Cannarella (.342/.422/.560 with 16 2B, 3 3B, 9 HR, and 51 RBI). He’s an actual pro prospect, and is expected to go in the first round of next year’s draft. Perhaps towards the top. He’s just a solid all-around player. His one knock against him is speed/base-running, as he’s 0-2 on stolen base attempts for the year. Also watch out for Blake “Balakay” Wright and his 21 Dongers, Jimmy “Over the Top” Obertop and his 19 Dongers, and Jacob “Leader of the Hinterlands” Hinderleider because I wanted to type that name.

Anchor of Gold Tiger Beat Hottest Pitcher: #00 Fr. RHP Drew “The Tits” Titsworth (0-4; 3.26 ERA; 12.10 K/9). Listen, their best pitcher is likely their Sunday starter, #19 Fr. RHP Aidan “The Knack” Knaak (5-1; 2.96 ERA; 11.96 K/9), but are you going to say he’s hotter than Titsworth? No no no no no.

Best NCAA Tournament result: Well, they’ve made it to Omaha 12 times, but have never won the title, so... one of those 12 times, I guess? I’ll say 2010.

Should Vanderbilt be scared? Yes. This is a place constructed by forced child convict labor. There are bound to be ghosts. Ghosts are scary. This has been Clemson: A Tautology.