Better Know a Regional Opponent: The Coastal Carolina Knockoff Game Penises

As the #3 seed in the Clemson Regional, Coastal Carolina will be Vanderbilt’s first opponent on Friday at 11 AM. So we’re definitely playing them. Possibly more than once. Again, at 11 AM. On a Friday. Are you planning to get any work done? Me neither.

The School: Coastal Carolina University. Founded in 1954 as Coastal Carolina Junior College, then renamed “University of South Carolina Coastal Carolina College” in 1960, a horribly unwieldy name that it somehow took them 33 years to scrap. Like High Point, they dropped the “College” from their name in the 1990s. Unlike High Point, you cannot blame the United Methodist Church for this change. This is a state school, and a directional state school at that, if you consider “Coastal” to be a direction. It is a direction in spirit, anyway.

Location: While Coastal Carolina is frequently associated with Myrtle Beach, and in fact the “Myrtle Beach Bowl” is played at Coastal Carolina’s home football stadium, Coastal Carolina is actually located 15 miles from Myrtle Beach in Conway. This is about like saying that MTSU is located in Nashville. It is not, and it is offensive that you would suggest this.

That said, I’m not sure that “this university is not actually in Myrtle Beach” is a knock on it.

The Mascot: The Chanticleer. The Chanticleer? According to Wikipedia:

Chanticleer, a rooster mentioned twice in Oscar Wilde’s short story The Canterville Ghost

A rooster? For a school in South Carolina? Where have I heard that one before?

Chanticleer, a character in the 1991 movie Rock-a-Doodle, voiced by Glen Campbell

So I guess we’re talking about a Rhinestone Cowboy sort of rooster here? Anyway, Coastal Carolina seems to be leaning really hard into the “we used to be a University of South Carolina satellite campus” thing with this one. Also, the mascot once got in a fight with the James Madison mascot.

Mascot fights: a truly underrated genre.

‘24 Record: 34-23 (16-14 Sun Belt.) No, I don’t know how that’s the record of an NCAA Tournament team from the Sun Belt, either.

How’d they get here? Went 1-2 in the Sun Belt Conference tournament, which, when paired with the team’s overall record and an RPI of 36 was somehow deemed worthy of an at-large bit. Now Florida getting a bid makes sense.

Best win: Took a midweek game from UNC in Chapel Hill on April 16 by a 5-4 score. In terms of weekend series? I guess it’s taking two of three from Louisiana on April 19-20. Notice that those happened in the same week.

Worst loss: Troy isn’t a bad team, but getting swept by them — the last two games by scores of 11-4 and 15-3 — from April 26-28 seems pretty bad.

Player to Watch: After a season of watching SEC teams routinely play gorilla ball, it’s weird to look down a roster and see a team with 82 homers on the season and no player with more than 16. #22 Super Senior OF Graham Brown (.365/.465/.631 with 18 2B, 12 HR, 60 RBI) is probably the team’s best all-around hitter. They’re very much a team that will try to string together five hits in a row rather than wait around for a three-run homer, though.

Anchor of Gold Tiger Beat Hottest Pitcher: Hell, this one is almost by default, since the team’s Friday night starter Riley Eikhoff (5-1, 5.30 ERA, .311 batting average against) is the only pitcher who’s made more than 10 starts this season. Coastal only has one pitcher on the staff with an ERA under 4.

Best NCAA Tournament result: Won the thing in 2016. Have not made it out of the regionals since.

Should Vanderbilt be scared? In my opinion, not really. A team with a shortage of power hitters and mediocre pitching is a matchup that should play into Vanderbilt’s hands.