Beer Goggles: South Carolina

Opponent: South Carolina Gamecocks

Brewery: Conquest Brewing

Beer: Kill Your Darlings

ABV, IBUs: Who know??

This is our second game in a row where our opponent hails from Columbia, which I think should lead us to a double IPA or Stout or double barreled something or another. But I’m going another route.

There is a wonderful and tragic video of Will Muschamp losing his every loving mind. Okay, there are a lot of those. But it’s this one. He’s younger, considered a defensive mastermind by most in the business, and was heir apparent at Texas until Florida came calling.

Unfortunately, what made him such a great assistant coach, primarily his ability to scheme and inspire players through his unbridled passion, has hindered him as a head coach. He’s single minded, laser focused on the single task at hand, and for him all that is necessary is the application of his mind and physical ability coupled with his exuberance. Which can often leave out things like “communication skills” or “patience” or “thoughtful consideration.”

But that kind of coach is waning in the modern CFB landscape. Yes, you need passion, but you can’t be beholden to it. Which I think is doubly difficult in a cultural landscape that encourages people to be “true to yourself.” What if yourself is wildly intelligent but totally emotionally undisciplined? Sometimes yourself needs to change to meet the skillsets that your position requires.

Yet, Coach Boom has grown on me. He seems to have mellowed? Okay, maybe not. I don’t know entirely, but his passion seems more reserved- like a volcano that hasn’t erupted (which is better than the one that has erupted). Maybe it’s the glasses. Maybe it’s the way he gives interviews about officials where he explicitly states he is upset but doesn’t want to get fined, implying all we need to know. Maybe it’s nice seeing that if there is hope of growth for Will Muschamp, then there is for all of us.

That’s why I picked Conquest Brewing. Their stated goal is “Fighting for your tastebuds since 2012.” They are a newer kid on the block in Columbia. Their distribution is small, but what they don’t have in prestige, they make up for in unashamed, unbridled effort.

Their beers range from easy drinking IPAs, chocolaty porters, to imperial stouts aged in rye whiskey and bourbon barrels. Here’s what they have to say, “How do you feel about variety? We happen to love it. We’re constantly whipping up new creations to go along with our mainstays. Maybe some styles you’ve heard of, maybe some you haven’t. Who knows? We’re wild and unpredictable like that.”

I mean... did Muschamp start this brewery four years before he got the job at in Columbia to establish roots for a future job change?

The beer, “Kill Your Darlings,” is a black lager with a restrained roast that’s surprisingly easy to toss back. It just keeps getting better. I mean the name alone. Wowzer. Black lager for USCe’s black jerseys and a restrained roast that’s easy to toss back, very much like their offense this year.

So in honor of the Great Volcano himself, and undoubtedly the phrase that he inspires his player with. Here is the perfect beer for South Carolina.

I didn’t think the Dores would win before this write up. But now, there is 100% chance we win on a bad call turned Muschamp meltdown into a 15 yard unsportsmanlike.

Happy Halloween!