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We Lost to Sideshow Bob

By Lucifer’s beard!

Here’s the thing: I know you don’t come to me for shooty hoops coverage. Further, I know many of you do not even refer to the sport as shooty hoops. This is where you are wrong.

Regardless, tonight’s game was horse shit.

We welcomed the South Cackalacky Game Penises into our gym, controlled them early, and then willfully threw it all away late in the 2nd half after Sideshow Bob went full hero ball.

I will not make any South Cackalacky jokes, nor will I make any penis-based puns. Why? Because we don’t deserve it after tonight. We were in control, lost control, and then relinquished control. (This was an unintentional penis pun, I assure you.)

Here’s the thing: today was absolute garbage for me. As I have been committed to the New Year’s Resolutions, I walked to work... in 10 degree weather... for about two miles. I did not think any of this through. My walk back, in even colder weather, was only possible because I had convinced myself that this game would be worth watching.

Similarly, Coach Bryce Drew seems to have not thought anything through barring injury to our 5 star PG. Is this unfair? Perhaps, but we’re far too many games into the season to worry about fairness. It’s about roster construction, and ours, three years into his tenure, has severe foundation concerns.

I have nothing more to say. I assume you do. See you in the comments.