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So, on Sunday, Christian noted that Vanderbilt C Damian Jones is now a 7-footer.
While Damian's growth spurt did not go unnoticed by the AoG staff, some people apparently have not noticed.
DAMIAN GREW A COUPLE INCHES ON THE FLIGHT?!?! https://t.co/nsTgphuReM
And Luke has his own theories on how exactly Damian has "grown."
I guess he's around 6'10 w/o shoes and he's letting his hair grow out
— Luke Kornet (@bigshin32) June 27, 2015
Look, I'll be totally honest about this. I'm 5'9", so I really can't tell the difference between 6'10" and 7'0". If you asked me, even if I had a measuring stick, I would probably just hold it up there, try to make out the other end of the stick, and then just throw up my hands and write "TALL" for their height. But apparently, when you are 7'0", you can tell exactly how tall the people around you are.
That also wasn't the most heinous measurement I've ever seen. "6'7" @Bamba35_ ya okay
— Luke Kornet (@bigshin32) June 27, 2015
That was former Vanderbilt men's basketball player James "Bamba" Siakam, who according to Vanderbilt was 6'7", but Luke Kornet thinks that is even less believable than Damian Jones being 7'0". But, uh, Luke? Got any comment on your own height, because Vanderbilt now says you're 7'1".
And @bigshin32 hates me so I've never hugged someone that's 7'1" before.
— Tommy Openshaw (@TommyOpenshaw) May 13, 2015
Truuuuuu https://t.co/vQVVtPGGDw
— Luke Kornet (@bigshin32) May 13, 2015
Now, what is not clear is whether Vanderbilt placekicker Tommy Openshaw has never hugged Luke Kornet -- and therefore has never hugged someone who is 7'1" -- or whether Tommy Openshaw has never hugged someone who is 7'1" because Luke Kornet is not 7'1".
Actually, it is entirely plausible that Luke Kornet is actually taller than 7'1" and therefore has not noticed Damian's growth spurt because Damian continues to be two inches shorter than Luke. Or that Luke is ribbing his teammates for being shorter than he is. Maybe he is ribbing Damian because Damian is not tall enough to get perks like this.
Was told I was "too tall" and "ineligible" to go through the body scanner. I'm right here you know. #TallPeopleHaveFeelingsToo
— Luke Kornet (@bigshin32) May 11, 2015
Seriously, stop it. Those of us of smaller stature would be thrilled to be excused from having to go through the TSA body scanner. For any reason.
So far, Luke has not commented on whether sixth-year senior Josh Henderson is actually 7 feet tall now. At this point, I am actually wondering what Vanderbilt is serving the big men at team meals because apparently all of them have grown an inch or more since last season. Or possibly Luke has his own theories. But, well, freshman big man D'jery Baptiste checks in at 6'10" so perhaps he needs to join Luke, Damian, and Josh at the big boy table for team meals.
We also learn from the updated roster that rising sophomore Matthew Fisher-Davis has bulked up to 185 and fellow sophomore Jeff Roberson is up to 220. Freshman Samir Sehic weighs in at 247, making him the biggest Commodore -- but don't worry, having seen him that's pretty much all muscle.
But seriously -- there's an SEC basketball team that's sporting three seven-footers in its frontcourt, and for once it isn't Kentucky. Can we at least be excited about something?