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Otherwise known as that weekend I throw the 50" plasma screen off the balcony when Tiger wins another major...just kidding he's not going to win.

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Do you know how long it took me to find a good picture of a hole at Augusta without Tiger Woods in it?
Do you know how long it took me to find a good picture of a hole at Augusta without Tiger Woods in it?
Michael Madrid-USA TODAY Sports

Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac... It's in the hole!

- Bill Murray, Caddyshack

You little son of a bitch ball! Why you don't you just go HOME? That's your HOME! Are you too good for your HOME?

- Happy Gilmore, Happy Gilmore I'm not talking about the cup (although yes, also very much the cup).  It's Masters weekend and therefore the best weekend of the golf schedule!

I realize to many of you, golf is intolerably boring to watch.  For many years, I was of the same mindset, so I understand what it's like to hold this wrong opinion. However, during college, I learned how wrong I was, instead learning the glory of sitting around with your buddies drinking entirely too much commenting on how y'all can never make these shots watching majors.

There's something magical about a lazy afternoon watching the best players in the world compete on the toughest course in the world.  No, it's not dicking around on the course with your buddies sharing a case, but you can certainly get a case and buddies together and watch in awe.  Watch as the world's best, who generally aren't in much better physical shape than you, own a course like you couldn't imagine.

I was going to give y'all a whole spiel about the history of Augusta National Golf Course and how it is quite literally the most beautiful golf course there is.  Yes, more beautiful than Pebble Beach... and I've been there, trust me. It is simply breathtaking.

One wonderful thing about the Masters is how Augusta prides itself on the media coverage.  Before 93, coverage of the Masters was limited only the the final four holes.  Since then, broadcast coverage has grown substantially and you can watch even the early rounds (which wasn't always possible).  In addition, Augusta insists on only 4 minutes of commercials per hour during the TV broadcasts of the tournament.  The broadcast is typically also considerably more formal than other golf tournaments, although Augusta doesn't make direct requirements on content.  Much of this is made possible because Augusta Still, having uninterrupted coverage is amazing and the Masters makes you realize just how much money other sports could still make if they moved to a similar format.

All those words is simply to say this - if you watch no other golf tournaments this year, this is the one to watch.  It's full of insane moments of both skill and drama.  Like when Larry Mize did this shot during the sudden death overtime to beat Greg Norman in the '87 Masters.

...or more recently, when Angel Cabrera broke my mind with the greatest approach shot you'll ever see.

I could fill this thread with TONS of amazing Masters moments (consider this a prompt, commentariat).


Well, smart money is on Rory McIlroy, but here's the full odds.  If you don't like Rory, here's a video to convince you otherwise.

That being said, the obvious guy for us to pull for is fellow Vanderbilt alumnus Brandt Snedeker, who had an article up on him in the Tennesean.  You may know Brandt most from the 2008 Masters, where he became a household name, shooting 69-68-70 in the first three rounds and only being 1 shot back at the end of the second day (and 2 shots back at the end of the third).  Unfortunately, a crushing 77 took Brandt out of contention, and he finished with a 3rd place finish.  Brandt not only had a real chance to win, but was the man everyone on the course was pulling for.  THEY fans love to watch the video of him crying after that tournament, and if that's not enough reason to hate THEM more, I don't know what is.

Personally, I also love Phil Mickelson, who's just an all around amazing person.  He loves his fans and you'll see him spending much of the tournament signing fans stuff between each shot.  It's great to see a guy who knows humility, and Phil's got it.  That said, whenever I'm in a tough spot on the course, I just think "What would Lefty Do?", then I do the opposite.  Phil's got a knack for screwing himself you see.

What about Tiger Woo... get out of my thread.


You'll want to know the tee times if you want to catch specific golfers.  Here they are for Thursday and Friday. I'll post the Saturday/Sunday tee times after the cut.


Or don't, earn my wrath.  See what you'll wring (wrought?... who cares).