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James Franklin: "We Will Never Fair Catch, Ever."

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Sep,15 2012; Nashville, TN, USA; Vanderbilt Commodores wide receiver Jordan Matthews (87) eludes a tackle attempt by Presbyterian Blue Hose defensive back DaRon Dickey (40) during the second half at Vanderbilt Stadium. The Commodores beat the Blue Hose 58-0. Mandatory Credit: Don McPeak-US PRESSWIRE

Here's an update from Coach Franklin's media availability at the end of practice today. Feel free to watch the entire thing, but focus in on the little section I've queued:

Reporter: "Can you talk about the punt return situation? We saw Jordan Matthews in there in the second half the other day. I think, prior to that, a few punts that maybe you probably wanted fair caught bounced past you and you gave up a little field position. Where are you guys at right there?"

Coach Franklin: "Well first of all, let me address that. We don't want any punts fair caught. I don't want a punt fair caught ever when we're here. If they can get six inches, I want them to get six inches. There's a halo rule now again. We should never, we should never, in the twenty-five years that we'll be here, we should never fair catch a punt. We're just looking for somebody that can get us positive yards. Twelve to fifteen yards, if they can go eighty, great. But we need somebody that can get us twelve to fifteen yards. If we can get somebody that everybody in this conference is scared of back there that can go eighty at any time, then we're really excited, but right now we just need somebody that's going to get us a first down on every return, and we're still looking for that right now."

Oh Coach Franklin, you know how to tease us so.

Protip: Watch the above through at 1/2 speed (mouse over the gears in the YouTube embed). Everyone sounds drunk as hell. "I'm REALLY mad at Jerron. Really. Heh Heh Heh. NO, I didn't say that, I didn't say that!" (4:14 in the video)